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Scenes We'd Like To See
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Category · Infobox

Series 1
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
Full list of scenarios

Series 2
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Series 3
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Series 4
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
Full list of scenarios

Series 5
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 6
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 7
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Full list of scenarios

Series 8
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
2010 Sport Relief Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 9
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 10
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 11
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Full list of scenarios

Series 12
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 13
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
New Year's Eve Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 14
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 15
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 16
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 17
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 18
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 19
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12 · 13
Full list of scenarios

Series 20
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Templates
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Link to a specific scenario
TOC for scenario lists

The following is a guide to the Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions made in the ninth episode of the tenth series.

Key[]

  • HD - Hugh Dennis
  • CA - Chris Addison
  • GD - Greg Davies
  • AP - Andy Parsons
  • SE - Simon Evans
  • MF - Micky Flanagan

Topics[]

Unlikely Things to Hear In a Police Station[]

MF - Hey Sarge, the microwave's broken again. Taser that meat pie for me, will you mate?

HD - I know it's unlikely, but I don't suppose anyone's handed in Colonel Gaddafi, have they?

AP - I noticed the burglar making his escape. At this moment, I cursed the police cutbacks and gave chase shouting "nee-naw, nee-naw, nee-naw."

CA - (Camp voice) All units be on the look for a purple Renault Clio, registration number Saffron, Doily, Tutu (2 2), Bonjela, Chrysanthemum, Hiya!

HD - No, we didn't manage to evict many of them, Sarge, but the good news is, I got some lucky heather.

AP - No, I've not come to report a crime. It's just that I really miss The Bill so I thought I'd pop in for an hour.

MF - Hey, Sarge, pass us the arts section out of The Guardian, will you, mate?

HD - (Foreign accent) Yes, yes, I know how identity parade works. That's her! That's her! That's the woman I robbed!

GD - Right, listen up, we've got a new man starting. He's half-man, half-horse: It's Inspector Morse.

SE - Ah, yes, our new 50-inch plasma TV. It is rather nice. Well, if you can't beat them, eh...

HD - I am charging you with the murder of Mrs. Thompson. That will be £7.19 please.

GD - Right, listen up, there's a giant fly attacking the station. I've called the SWAT team.

AP - Thank God you've arrived, Officer! Some bloke just jumped into the boot of my car and shot himself fourteen times.

CA - We got the Tocks report back: It turns out they go straight after the Ticks.

MF - I was about to arrest her, Sarge, but I'll be honest, my bottle went cause she shouted out "I PUT A CURSE UPON YOU! I PUT A CURSE UPON YOU!"

Unlikely Things to Hear in a Science Documentary[]

CA - Having cloned Ian Wright, we now know that two Ian Wrights don't make an Ian Wrong.

MF - Erectile dysfunction: Physical problem, or has the wife let herself go a bit?

HD - Well, this is incredible, this is a whole new species of miniature tiger! Oh no, hang on, it's a cat.

SE - Now pay attention, here comes the shampoo bit!

CA - We've discovered the source of the quark. It's the sound made by a posh duck.

HD - This is a red dwarf. His name is Antony Worrall Thompson.

AP - Welcome to The Sky at Night, and if we look out... Oh hell, Croydon's on fire!

CA - Despite getting a very bad press, biological weapons work at much lower temperatures that non-biological weapons.

AP - Without penicillin: well, I'd still be cursing that day I went to Bangkok.

MF - Tonight, we look at the ginger community: Physical anomaly, or God's cruel joke?

AP - Ahh, the Northern Lights. Oh no, Manchester's on fire!

HD - But will they find a cure in time? The last hope for mankind lies with scientists here, at the Laboratoires Garnier.

MF - Tonight on Show Me the Evidence, we look at the traveller community. Can they really, put a curse on you?

GD - And as the sperm swim towards the eggs, it's hard not to think that I've ruined this fried breakfast.

AP - I'm never again going to have a fried breakfast!

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