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Scenes We'd Like To See
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Category · Infobox

Series 1
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
Full list of scenarios

Series 2
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Series 3
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Series 4
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
Full list of scenarios

Series 5
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 6
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 7
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Full list of scenarios

Series 8
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
2010 Sport Relief Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 9
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 10
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 11
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Full list of scenarios

Series 12
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 13
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
New Year's Eve Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 14
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 15
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 16
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 17
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 18
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Templates
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Link to a specific scenario
TOC for scenario lists

The following is a guide to the Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions made in the sixth episode of the thirteenth series.

Key Edit

  • HD - Hugh Dennis
  • EB - Ed Byrne
  • MJ - Milton Jones
  • AP - Andy Parsons
  • ZL - Zoe Lyons
  • RK - Russell Kane

Topics Edit

Unlikely Things To Hear In Court Edit

AP - We the jury have yet to reach a final verdict, but we would like to have a guess: Is it Mrs. Peacock with a candlestick in the library?

HD - The defendant is, as you can see, an evil man with a black heart, but nice, firm buttocks.

MJ - The Guildford Four and the Birmingham Six were miscarriages of justice, but S Club 7 must remain in prison.

EB - If I'm guilty of anything it's caring too much and embezzlement. Embezzlement, embezzlement and caring too much, rhat's all I'm guilty of.

ZL - It appears we have a hung jury. Thank you gentlemen, you can put your trousers back on now.

AP - OK, Mr. Pistorius, there will now be a toilet break. Don't anybody else go in there!

RK - Before I pass down the sentence of death, how about a selfie? Oh my god, your death face is so random!

MJ - You are accused of stealing top of the range toilet rolls. How do you plead, quilty or not quilty?

ZL - No Mr. Culson, we're not going to tell you your sentence, instead we've left a message for you on Hugh Grant's voicemail.

HD - I am now going to pronounce sentence. Sen-tence.

AP - Mr Clapton, I put it to you that it is highly unlikely that you did not shoot the deputy, given that you have already admitted that you did shoot the sheriff.

MJ - Okay, "Rock a bye baby on the tree top..." Oh, alibi!

EB - Well it's been a long and complex trial, so before you sentencing... Let's have a look at some of your best bits!

RK - Mr. Pistorius, the court rejects your defence that at the time of the crime you were legless.

HD - And now Mr. Harris, it's time for your sentence. Can you tell what it is yet?

MJ - You are accused of unnecessarily advertising a make of smoothie. How do you plead? Be careful.

Things You Wouldn't Hear In A Nature Documentary Edit

AP - Watch out for crocs, because anybody wearing Crocs is a bellend.

EB - But what's incredible about the emperor penguin is its ability to make you look like a shit father.

HD - This is the most fantastic migration I've ever seen. These Romanians are moving in next door to Nigel Farage.

RK - If you're in the jungle for a few months, use a leaf and some river moss from a bank. It really does feel like a lady.

ZL - Well it took some pliers and an awful lot of Gaffa tape, but I've finally got this flamingo's legs on the right way round

MJ - I have spent my whole life living with hyenas. It hasn't been easy, but there've been a lot of laughs as well.

HD - The barbs that come off these tiny creatures can be very painful. This one just called me a talentless wanker.

AP - The pack of meerkats surrounded the helpless lizard and within seconds he'd been forced to change his car insurance supplier.

RK - The comics or jestalings all jostled for position eager to present their humour to the large alpha male. (imitates buzzer)

EB - A badger, in its natural environment, on the hard shoulder being pecked at by crows.

HD - This lioness has just had four cubs, but it's not as sweet as it looks. She's just had three Brownies, two Guides, and an Adventure Scout.

ZL - And this little fella, this little bird, his head can literally turn three-hundred an.... No that's owls, isn't it?

EB - And now the male attempts to you-know-what by putting his thingamajig in the female's whatchamacallit.

ZL - And here I am in the shrubbery outside the BBC centre. And I think I've spo... I have, I've spotted one. This is extremely rare. It is, It's a female panelist.

AP - Just one bite from this snake can paralyse the nervous system in three seconds-- (Freezes in position)

RK - You'll have to excuse the trembling excitement in my voice as I'm currently being noshed off by Bill Oddie.

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