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The following is a list of Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions for the tenth episode of the eighteenth series.
Key[]
EG: Ed Gamble
KG: Kerri Godliman
RhJ: Rhys James
RoJ: Rosie Jones
HD: Hugh Dennis
TA: Tom Allen
Topics[]
Things You Wouldn't Hear On A Breakfast Show[]
RoJ: MORNING, C***S!
HD: Just checking, this isn't live, is it?
EG: And later on, you could go on the trip of a lifetime because Gino's telling us how to cook acid.
RhJ: And coming up, we're speaking to eight-year-old coffee aficionado Jasper who has just claimed the title for Britain's youngest wanker.
KG: See me at eight, I've had enough of all this bullshit; I'll tell you what's what after the break join me, Lorraine!
EG: You're watching Good Morning Britain on ITV +1, so the clock in the corner's wrong and you're already late for work.
HD: Well, to hear more about the explosion in the optician's, let's go to the flying eye.
KG: Reports coming in of a major incident at the origami finals, more on that as it unfolds.
RoJ: And now, for the sixty second news roundup, it's Rosie Jones. Hello. Goodbye!
TA: Later on, we'll be looking at what causes breakdowns. Maybe it's getting up at 3 o'clock in the morning to do this job for five years. Maybe, maybe, MAYBE!
RhJ: Today on the show, we'll be discussing sexism. Why is it that when a woman says she slept with loads of people she is called a "slag", but when I say that I am called a "liar"?
HD: Well, just time for one final quick look at the papers. (mimes looking through papers) Yep, she still wants a divorce.
KG: Oh, Piers, that's such a compassionate, well-articulated thought.
TA: And now, let's find out what the weather's doing in your area. Or you can just pull back the curtain, David, I mean, do I have to do everything for you if you're going to sleep?
EG: Travel news now, chaos on the trains as one of the lubed-up passengers has fired out the window.
RhJ: And now for every lad's favourite part of the show, it's the weather. Over to... ah, it's a bloke one, switch it to Babestation.
HD: Well, it's backing up at Junction 2, but don't worry, I'll get a poo in the next break.
Unlikely Lines From A Star Wars Movie[]
HD: Chewbacca did not die in vain. These UGG boots are lovely.
RhJ: Uh, sorry I'm late everyone, I was just in my bunk having what we refer to here on the Falcon as a "Hand solo".
EG: Yeah, give it a few minutes. It's an energy-saving lightsabre.
HD: I done you a favour and now you owe me one, Kenobi!
KG: Actually, this Ewok identifies as a Shewok.
RoJ: A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away... Mock the Week made a set that was fucking inaccessible to disabled people!
HD: No, no, I gave up ages ago. I'm Darth Vaper.
EG: (as Yoda) Speaking like this, normal is not. Call me an ambulance. Having a stroke, I am.
KG: If this is space, why aren't we floating around?!
TA: Ah, it is the War of the Clones. Or as I like to call it, Love Island.
KG: Welcome to the Death Star. Sorry to be one of those hosts, but we're actually a no-shoe Death Star.
EG: Right, cancel all my appointments, Chewbacca's just booked in for a Brazilian!
RhJ: (shaking his hand) Oh my god, someone's doing a Jedi mind trick on me. I'm not in control of my hand. I think they're trying to send you a message. AARRGHH!
EG: No, I'm not Darth Vader, I'm Darth Vader's Tory brother, Tax e-Vader.
TA: Oh, do we have to fight with lightsabers? It's just that no-one looks good under strip lighting.
HD: That was Tom Allen with Jedi for the Straight Guy.