The following is a list of Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions for the eighth show of the nineteenth series.
|
Key[]
EG: Ed Gamble
RL: Ria Lina
RJ: Rhys James
MA: Maisie Adam
HD: Hugh Dennis
EB: Ed Byrne
Topics[]
Unlikely Lines From A Fantasy Film Or TV Show[]
EB: Oh, Master Frodo, I've got a ring you can destroy.
HD: Hufflepuff? No thanks. You got any cocaine?
RL: You shall not pass! Oh, you're Trump supporters. The Senate chamber is just down there.
EG: Tell you want, girls, I've been enjoying Quidditch much more since Hermione taught me the vibrating broom spell!
MA: He may only drink blood, but he eats everything. He is Vampire the Buffet Slayer.
RL: So you must be the beast-- Oh, you're the beauty. Awkward.
EG: Unfortunately, sir, your dragon has failed its emissions test. May I interest you in an electric eel?
RJ: The amulet has come to life! You know what this means: Our table at TGI's is ready.
MA: I'm really sorry, but my granny says she's not coming in the TARDIS unless its the white Doctor.
HD: I am the greatest magician in all the seven kingdoms. Was this your card?
RJ: Yeah, it turns out those weren't his dark materials. We found his dark materials on a hard drive, he's now on a register.
MA: "I'm the king of the north!" "Actually, Andy, it's just mayor of Greater Manchester."
EG: No, sire, the Orcs will not kill any Hobbits today, they are doing Veganuary!
EB: The red pill represents your desire to know the truth. The blue pill will have you rock hard for hours.
RJ: This may look like a normal bookcase, but if I take out this encyclopaedia and turn to page 206, there's a diagram of a boobs.
EB: "You're a wizard, Harry." "No shit, ginger nuts. What gave it away, the wand or the fucking school we go to?"
RL: And in the battle of Winterfell, the night king turned to his white walkers and said, (as Donald Trump) I know you're hurt, but you need to go home. We need to have peace, you're very special. We love you, but go home.
Unlikely Dating Profiles[]
EG: (in a bad Southern belle's voice) Lonely Southern belle seeks handsome delivery driver.
HD: (wearing a pair of glasses) You may recognize me from Mock The Week...
MA: I'll be honest, I'm only on here 'cause I've been banned from all the other apps. But what am I looking for? About 11,780 votes. Fast.
EG: I'm @chriswhitty69 and I'm here to announce a cockdown in tier phwoar.
EB: Are you single? Over 50? Eugh.
RJ: 46 year old master of reverse psychology seeks no one, I'm fine on my own.
HD: Are you looking for companionship, unconditional love, and long walks? Great. I'm selling a dog.
MA: I want to be your Ford Contina 'cause no one's been in me since the 1980s.
EG: Lonely drummer seeks the one, the two, the 1-2-3-4!
RJ: They say nothing worth having comes easily. Well then, how do you explain my dick?
RL: Hi, I'm Deb, I'm an anti-vaxxer, and I'm-- (goes into a coughing fit) I'm fine! (collapses)
HD: It's very simple. I'm looking for an Irishman who speaks like a Southern belle! (heads over to Dara)
MA: I'm a bit of a pocket rocket: 11 men have died in me.
EB: I'm recently divorced after 14 years of marriage and I'm looking to sort of mix it up a bit, try new things, maybe a bit of cock!
RJ: Sick of seeing your family? Date me, Meghan Markle.
RL: I've been married for 20 years, I just need a fuck!