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Scenes We'd Like To See
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Category · Infobox

Series 1
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
Full list of scenarios

Series 2
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Series 3
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Series 4
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
Full list of scenarios

Series 5
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 6
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 7
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Full list of scenarios

Series 8
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
2010 Sport Relief Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 9
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 10
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 11
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Full list of scenarios

Series 12
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 13
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
New Year's Eve Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 14
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 15
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 16
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 17
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 18
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 19
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12 · 13
Full list of scenarios

Series 20
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Templates
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TOC for scenario lists

The following is a guide to the Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions made in the tenth episode of the fifth series.

Key[]

Topics[]

What a News Reporter Would Never Say[]

  • RH: Next on News 24, I'm going to punch a zebra. Who cares? No one's watching.
  • HD: Here, children as young as eight are forced to earn their own living-- MORE POLISH! MORE POLISH! I WANT TO SEE MY FACE!
  • FB: Here on the streets it seems that Britain is completely in the grip of gang culture. This is John Simpson...FOR THE ITN MASSIF!
  • GY: Can you hear the bombs falling? No? That's because they're in Baghdad, I'm here in Peckham!
  • HD: Reports of a mystery man loitering in the area... turned out to be me.
  • FB: News just in: (confused) "Go to a break. Your wife's been hit by a truck."
  • EB: And it was just a few feet from here that the shots were fired. I know, I fired them.
  • HD: Well, finally the power in Beirut seems to be back on. The radiator I'm chained to is getting quite warm.
  • FB: Even amidst the devastation of this earthquake there are still stories of hope. I found a man's wallet!
  • AP: (in a distorted voice) I am actually in my bedroom but I am trying to make it look like I'm in Baghdad on a satellite phone
  • FB: And I can't help thinking that if my country was gripped by famine... I'd just move.

[Too Hot For TV entries are below]

  • FB: Rape, Murder, Arson. I've had a fantastic weekend.
  • GY: They wouldn't make Trevor McDonald do this shit!
  • FB: And it anything can be learned from this high school massacre, it's surely this: Don't mess with goths, they're fucking mental.

Unlikely Letters To Be Read Out On Points of View[]

  • HD: Why oh why oh why... is the structure of my chromosomes.
  • EB: Dear BBC, I watched a light entertainment programme on your network the other night that wasn't hosted by Graham Norton. Is he ill?
  • RH: (in an amazed tone) Dear BBC, how did you manage to get those hippos to swim in a circle?!
  • GY: Dear BBC, I am a Nigerian general with 30 million pounds to put in your bank account...
  • HD: (in a perverted voice) Last night, I turned on to your new porn channel... CBoobies.
  • FB: (in a weird voice) Dear Points of View, I would like to complain about the weird voice you're reading out my letter in!
  • RH: Dear Points of View, has anyone else noticed that Pat Butcher looks a lot like the honey monster from the Sugar Puffs advert?
  • AP: Dear BBC, when are you going to show Nuts on the Road, Nim Nim Nim?!
  • FB: (in an angry tone) Dear Points of View, I watched Silent Witness with the sound off and it didn't make any sense!
  • EB: Dear BBC, well it's now 30 years down the line and I'm no closer to owning a robotic house-maid. Tomorrow's World? Tomorrow's Horseshit more like!
  • FB: Dear Points of View, watching Queer Eye for the Straight Guy made me think that when I made gay friends, they give me fashion tips. Actually, they fucked me.

[Too Hot For TV entries are below.]

  • HD: Dear BBC, last night I was watching Songs Of Praise, masturbating furiously as usual...
  • FB: Dear Points Of View, can I complain about the gratuitous fucking swearing every fucking week on Mock The Fucking Week?
  • HD: Dear BBC, are you paying too much for your car insurance?
  • RH: Dear BBC, please bring back the old idents. Yours, that black bloke in the wheelchair.
  • FB: The other night I was watching Nigella Lawson. I picked up some good tips on baking bread... and in the process, I just about ripped my cock off.
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