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Scenes We'd Like To See
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Category · Infobox

Series 1
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
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Series 2
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
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Series 3
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
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Series 4
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
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Series 5
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
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Series 6
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
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Series 7
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
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Series 8
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
2010 Sport Relief Special
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Series 9
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
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Series 10
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Christmas Special
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Series 11
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
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Series 12
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
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Series 13
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
New Year's Eve Special
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Series 14
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
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Series 15
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Christmas Special
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Series 16
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
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Series 17
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Christmas Special
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Series 18
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 19
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12 · 13
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Series 20
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

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The following is a guide to the Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions made in the twelfth episode of the seventh series.

Key[]

Topics[]

Things You Wouldn't Hear at a Party Conference[]

  • DM - Blackpool's nice, isn't it?
  • HD - Unlike other party leaders, I can mention I am not a slave to the autocue. Smile, pause, applause.
  • AP - Would you please welcome the man who's made the Conservatives an electable force again - GORDON BROWN!
  • RH - I'm gonna turn my back for one minute, and I want whoever stole David Blunkett's dog to put it back.
  • HD - The delegates were so impressed by Menzies Campbell's speech that they gave him a ten minute standing cremation
  • MJ - Ah, kiss the baby, no, I'd better not, it might set my tag off.
  • DM - Well I must say on this issue, I'm with Al-Qaeda.
  • HD - (Scottish accent) So for Scottish independence and cheaper parking, vote SNCP.
  • RH - In an attempt to be more like Barack Obama, Gordon Brown has sensationally blacked up.
  • BN - And I do believe we are the only party who are going to do anything about the amount of unemployed dwarves in this country, In fact, I saw one just outside holding a sign that said "No job, too small".
  • HD - We're gonna open this BNP conference with a prayer, so if you'd all like to turn towards Mecca.


Unlikely Things To Hear On a History Documentary


  • RH: Now follows a documentary about the Queen Mother, which contains nudity and strong language from the start.
  • HD: And it was here, on this exact spot that faced with thirty thousand baying Frenchmen, that Henry the Fifth... shat himself.
  • DM: (scrapes throat) On the first day of the Battle of the Somme, over sixty thousand documentaries were commissionned.
  • MJ: (imitates old voice) I was in the parachute ridgement, I was dropped over occupied territory. (imitates falling) Four thousand feet, three thousand, two thousand... I pulled the cord (pulls imaginary cord)... my cagoule tightened.
  • AP: Two world wars, and one World Cup. Doo dah.
  • BN: And it was actually here, in this very tower, the princes were slaughtered, William on Red Bull and vodka and um...
  • MJ: 1547. Nostradamus predicts the rock group the Kaiser Chiefs. He also predicts a riot.
  • RH: A one-sided battle stood William of Orange. on the other side Charles of O2 and Richard of Vodafone.
  • AP: The final outcome of the Second World War has changed the world forever. So, if you don't want to know the result, look away now.
  • BN: Next: Eva Braun: The inventor of the Lady Shave.
  • MJ: So it was my job to assassinate Himmler. So I stood behind a tree and waited for his car to come around the corner. Then I leapt out and said 'Boo!' Sometimes, all we had was the element of surprise.
  • HD: Napoleon was in prison in St. Helena, which was extremely uncomfortable for her. His hat was pointy, and he never took his boots off.
  • DM: The Loch Ness Monsters. Fact or fiction? Fiction, goodnight.
  • MJ: (imitates old voice) Of course, during the war, I was brought up in Dorset. None of us expected the surprise Japanese attack on Poole Harbour.
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